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Christian Singles Today - Last Rites

Christianity Today's Christian Singles Today newsletter has published one final edition - to explain why it is closing.

Obviously it all came down to money:

As you may know, last month Christianity Today International had to do what our current economic climate has forced so many organizations to do: we had to say goodbye to 30 of our co-workers and many of our cherished ministries.

As a non-profit organization with razor-thin operating margins, we had to cut back the extent of our ministry and focus on those ministries we believe that God has called us to continue and that he will continue to sustain in the future. (Continue reading...)

Christian Singles - Speaking Out For The Single Life

Does your church hold up marriage as some kind of exalted state? As something hugely desirable? That if you're over, say, about thirty years of age and unmarried then you might be some kind of - loser?

Then check out Matthew 19:12, where Jesus cites as quite normal those who have "renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven." Or 1Corinthians 7:25-28, where Paul praises the single life. (Continue reading...)

Christian Dating - What Is It Like? How Hard Is It?

Nicole, a very pretty 21-year-old Chicago radio producer, has decided to blog her Christian dating experience.

She writes: "This IS NOT meant for me to find "Mr. Right," just to clarify what the Christian dating scene is like. I just want to find what Christian dating is like outside of college. How hard is it? We'll see. . ."

Actually, it seems her quest is also connected to her radio work.

Anyway, on what is apparently her first date, she asks the guy to write about his expectations: (Continue reading...)

Trends in Christian Online Dating

Online Christian dating services are booming. The number of companies involved is increasing, their websites are becoming ever more sophisticated, and membership numbers are also apparently on the rise.

But is it all just a fad, a trend that could explode, like the dot-com boom of the late 1990s?

Christian Counseling Services spoke to the heads of some of the leading online Christian dating services to learn their views. (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Boom in a Recession

What sort of impact does a recession have on the online dating business?

A while back there were reports that the big Aussie rsvp.com.au dating service had seen a 31 per cent jump in new memberships in the first three months of 2009, compared to the last three months of 2008.

According to a company director: "A recent survey undertaken of our membership highlighted that singles believe it is far more expensive being on your own than in a relationship. (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Top Tips for Finding the Right Partner (Part II)

Here are further tips to Christian singles seeking to find a partner on one of the many online dating services. This advice comes from the heads of seven of the leading services, in interviews with Christian Counseling Services.

"Convey the importance of Christ in your life to your prospective partner," advises a spokesperson for ChristianDatingForFree.com. "Be honest and describe yourself with sincerity. Upload multiple current photos of yourself, some with friends or family…and smile! At least in one of them…

"Don’t be afraid to initiate conversation or send a wink - and don’t be impatient; give it time, don’t get discouraged if you don’t find matches right away. If you're not having luck, get involved in conversations in live chat rooms or chat forums and make friends there." (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Top Tips for Finding the Right Partner (Part I)

Christian singles who join online dating services are generally a pretty optimistic lot. After all, they have God on their side.

But there are still many tips that will help them enjoy a more satisfying experience. Here are words of advice from the heads of seven of the leading dating services, given in interviews with Christian Counseling Services.

"Be open, be honest with the people you meet, and make sure your heart is true," says Yuri Gorzey, CEO and founder of JCMATCH. "Have a clearly defined set of criteria for your mate; most importantly, the Number One criterion is to make sure he or she is truly a Christian and that you share the same beliefs and values." (Continue reading...)

Christian Singles - What Women Want

What are single Christian women looking for in a man? Some answers come from an intriguing blog, Single Or Married This Is For You, run by a woman who calls herself Lady A.

Lady A describes herself as follows:

Very playful, love to laugh, dance and serenade. Compassionate about a lot of things. Extremely shy in large settings. I can get very panicky if I'm lost in a new area. I look forward to the day I go to Ghana. Shoes and jewelry are my thing. I live each day as it comes.

Her blog contains a lot of information about the Christian single life. For example, in one posting she offers a huge list of dating tips. Another is titled "He's Fine...But Is He Saved?" (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Mistakes to Avoid (Part II)

Here are more of the mistakes that Christians make when they use online dating services. These come from interviews with the heads of leading Christian dating services.

Mike McCartney, a certified life and relationships coach, is founder of SinglesOfFaith.com. He says some of the mistakes Christians make when searching for a partner online are as follows:

- being too trusting too soon;
- making decisions based on their heart, rather than their head;
- making decisions without the input of trusted, wise counsellors;
- overspiritualization - "God must be in this, it feels so good;"
- not having the relationship skills necessary to make a relationship (hard, hard work) last forever. (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Mistakes to Avoid (Part I)

An increasing number of Christian singles are using online dating services to try and find a partner. But it is easy to make mistakes.

In interviews with Christian Counseling Services, the heads of some leading Christian online dating services warned of some of the mistakes that they encounter.

According to Clark S., CEO of Single Christian Network: "Perhaps the biggest mistake is made by jumping in too fast. Sometimes loneliness clouds our thinking. A Christian should use wisdom and prudence. This means checking into things."

And he adds: "Take time to really find out about the other person before rushing into things. And of course, the Christian should pray and seek guidance. The same mistakes are made with online dating as are made with meeting other ways." (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Advice for the Nervous (Part II)

Online dating services are booming, including a growing number for Christians. Yet some Christians remain nervous about using them, for all kinds of reasons.

Here are some more words of reassurance, from the heads of some of the leading dating services.

A spokesperson for ChristianDatingForFree.com agrees that it is natural to feel concerned about online dating.

"It is of course 'the internet' where bad people can do bad things," he says. "Perhaps concerned is not the right word - those engaged in online dating should always be aware and navigate the first steps of communication with caution. (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Advice for the Nervous (Part I)

Online dating services are booming, including a growing number for Christians. Yet some Christians remain nervous about using them, for all kinds of reasons.

In a series of interviews, Christian Counseling Services asked the heads of some of the leading dating services to provide words of reassurance. Here are some of their comments.

Chris Algra of cMatch feels that most people are not so scared any longer.

However, he adds: "For singles concerned for their safety: Yes, bad things do happen and not everybody is truthful, but when you follow a few vital guidelines you can be pretty sure you’re safe. We have published safety guidelines and dating tips to help you. (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Choosing the Best (Part II)

Here is more advice for Christian singles wanting to join an online Christian dating service, in order to find a marriage partner, but who are unsure how to choose.

The guidance comes from the heads of some of the leading online dating services.

"Try many - as many as you sense God is calling you to," says Mike McCartney, the founder of SinglesOfFaith.com. "This is a 'numbers game,' in that we'll need to meet hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of folks before we meet the person God has for us.

"Most of us have much growth to experience prior to God determining that we're ready to meet His choice, so, unfortunately, a number of the 'relationships' we experience are 'mere' growth opportunities for us as He prepares us. (Continue reading...)

Online Christian Dating Services - Choosing the Best (Part I)

Finding the right marriage partner can be a traumatic experience for some Christian singles. An increasing number of people are joining online dating services, and there are now many of these.

But how do you choose the best service?

Christian Counseling Services spoke with the heads of some of the leading dating services for advice for Christian singles. (Continue reading...)

Christian Singles - Religion vs Romance - "I Have Never Had Sex Or Even Kissed A Woman"

I've already cited the Focus on the Family webzine Boundless as an excellent resource for Christian singles. A new posting from columnist Ted Slater has a fascinating commentary on the Christian singles life.

He has received an email from a colleague, Jeffrey, on the question of religion and romance. In essence, Jeffrey is saying that when he invokes his Christian principles and refuses to indulge in intimacy with a woman, she is turned off. It seems she also wants a little romance. (Continue reading...)

Starting a New Online Christian Dating Service

Over at Christian Forums a newbie asks for advice on launching a new Christian dating site:

I really want to make it the best one out there as there seems to be a lack of really great ones.

Just wondering if any of you guys had any experience of dating dates? (Continue reading...)

Single, Christian and Sexy

Patricia Weerakoon is one of Australia's leading sexologists, and a senior lecturer at the University of Sydney. She is also a committed Christian who leads church sex education programs.

This is what she told the Australian Broadcasting Corporation about her work:

God made sex between man and woman to be absolutely a perfect joyous thing, and in the process of us sinning, we have just drawn it into something that has now been portrayed as evil and ugly and something to be used, and you know, we come across things like rape and pornography and sex addition. (Continue reading...)

Living as a Single Christian Woman

Stephanie at the Stephanie's Mommy Brain blog has just concluded an excellent series of guest postings on the theme "Living as a Single Christian Woman."

It is well worth reading each of the articles in full. Here are a few excerpts.

Here is Ann:

I can honestly say right now that I don’t regret one day of singleness.

God’s timing was not mine, but it was truly perfect. I can still feel the pain of those difficult years, but I am proud of that time and of all I learned from it. I wouldn’t trade it for anything, not even for the privilege of being able to date my husband through my college years.

God answered my youthful prayers for protection and for my marriage, and I am so thankful. (Continue reading...)

Christian Singles - Where Are All The Single Christian Men?

Five years ago Christianity Today ran an article "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" which examined the concern of many Christian women - the lack of single Christian men in church.

Every time the company newsletter comes out at the Christian office where I work, there's a laundry list of new single female employees. In stark contrast, I could count the single men in our company practically on one hand—out of a company of 150 workers! (Continue reading...)

Looking for Latter-Day Saints (Mormon) Online Dating Services

A reader asks Times Union "trends, friends and fashion" blogger Kristi Gustafson if she knows of any Mormon (Latter-Day Saints) online dating services.

She doesn't post a reply, but a couple of readers do. One suggests trying Google.

Now, that's a sensible idea. I tried, and here is what I came up with. (Continue reading...)

JCMATCH.COM - "More Than Just an Online Dating Service"

JCMATCH.COM says its mission is " to provide a safe, encouraging, affordable, state-of-the-art, authentic Christian environment where Believers may form reliable dating and marriage relationships that will last forever and an environment for influencing a wider community with God-given values and relieving human suffering worldwide."

Yuri Gorzey, CEO and founder of JCMATCH, answered questions from Christian Counseling Services.

Please tell me a little about your company and your affiliates (“A Time to Love Magazine,” and your charity). When did you start business? How are you different from other online dating services?

We started our JCMATCH project in 2007, focusing initially on finding investors, hiring top-notch experts, software developers and field experts, great writers for our magazine, and conducting tons of research and analysis on how to deliver the best online experience that meets the needs of Christian singles. We launched the dating site in March this year.

JCMATCH.COM is more than just an online dating service. The greatest differentiator from other dating sites is our Christian “environment.” In just a short period of time after we launched JCMATCH.COM, more than 20,000 people joined this dynamic Christian singles community. Feedback from many of them is that our site is different and welcome because it is truly a Christian site (not one that is “Christian” in name only). (Continue reading...)

cMatch - Searching the Globe for Your Perfect Match

The cMatch online dating service is, in its own words, "a clean and safe Christian dating site where born-again singles from all over the world meet for love, courtship, friendship and fellowship...While you sleep, work, attend church or do other important things, cMatch will search the globe for your perfect match...Our editors are online dating specialists and committed Christians."

Chris Algra of cMatch spoke with Christian Counseling Services.

Please tell me a little about cMatch. Who runs the company and how did it start? Is it completely free?

We are a small team of committed Christians involved in local Christian dating sites since 2000. We’re extremely passionate about what we’re doing: bringing Christians together in honor of God. (Continue reading...)

Christian Singles - Praying Away Your Sex Drive

I have already linked to the excellent Boundless webzine in my Christian Singles links page. It comes from Focus on the Family and is a trove of resources for the Christian single.

The founder of Boundless is Candice Watters, author of "Get Married," which is aimed at Christian women. She now writes an advice column for women, featured bi-weekly at Boundless, and it is always worth reading.

Her latest posting is titled "Praying Away Your Sex Drive," and it is in answer to a 26-year-old woman who says she has never been in a dating relationship, but deeply desires marriage:

My question and my current struggle is this: Just because societal norms are to marry later (whether due to personal choice or due to circumstances in this fallen world — the latter being my situation at present), doesn't mean our God-given sexuality is delayed along with the marriage plans. So how do we deal? (Continue reading...)

The Single Christian Life: "I’ve Been Told ‘No’ by Single Christian Women So Much That It’s Second Nature"

Does God have a plan for each of His people?

Yes, I believe he does.

But for the single Christian does that mean sitting back and waiting for the right partner to come along?

I'm not sure. But I do remember the joke I heard from a particular pastor: "If a young lady just sits at home praying for a nice young man to come knocking at her door she'll end up marrying a Jehovah's Witness." (Continue reading...)

Eleven Two Fund Management - Financial Planning from a Biblical Perspective

Thomas G. Cloud Jr., president of Georgia-based Eleven Two Fund Management, uses Biblical principles in his work. According to the company website: "We hold people accountable to make wise financial decisions and have a Christ-like mind set that will give them a better chance to experience God's best for their life. This includes His peace, wisdom, joy, and contentment."

Thomas answered questions from Christian Counseling Services.

Some Christians are suffering with debt problems in the current recession. What general words of guidance can you offer them?

To answer this question, I would say two things. Number one would be for Christians to start by recognizing that being in debt and particularly carrying large amounts of debt is not a wise position to be in. Then, once they recognize this, much like the Christian life itself, is that once you recognize you are a sinner, you are ready and able to receive God’s grace. In the same situation here, once someone recognizes that debt is not a wise position to put themselves in, then I think their behavior is ready to change. (Continue reading...)

Alcohol and Drug Addiction Treatment at Victory Home - "You're Either Set Free by the Blood of Jesus, or Forever Dependent on a Program."

Victory Home is a Christian non-denominational ministry located on 37 beautiful acres near Tallulah Falls, Georgia. Victory Home provides resident care and guidance for men suffering from alcohol and drug addiction. A spokesperson answered questions about their work.

Please tell me a little about Victory Home and your work. What is your history? Where do your clients come from?

Victory Home is a Christian retreat for men suffering from alcohol and/or drug addiction. Since 1959, over ten thousand men have been treated at Victory Home. Our clients come from all over the United States, referred by pastors, counselors, probation officers, judges, and graduates of Victory Home. (Continue reading...)

eHarmony - Is It Christian? (And Does It Matter?)

Several years ago I received an unexpected email from an old friend - a devout Christian - with whom I had lost contact. He announced that he was married again, three years after the tragic death of his first wife.

He wrote:

I am remarried now to Jane, a lady I met through eHarmony. She is wonderful. We just celebrated our first anniversary. Have lost a lot of weight and am healthier than I have been in a long time.

Considerable debate continues within the Christian community as to whether or not eHarmony is a Christian company and/or whether Christians should use this service. (Continue reading...)

Objectionable Comments on Christian Chat Rooms

What do you do when a member of a Christian online dating service begins making objectionable comments to other members in the chat rooms? (Continue reading...)

Dove Online Christian Counseling - Serving God, Counseling to the World

Patricia Jones runs Dove Online Christian Counseling, a unique service providing advice by both email and telephone. She has a particular specialty helping ministers and their wives.

In an interview with Christian Counseling Services she talks about the advantages of online counseling, and how she believes this is the wave of the future. And she speaks frankly about her own background as an abused minister's wife.

Please tell me a little about Dove Online Christian Counseling.

As you can see by my Pastoral Background page, I have been counseling people since 1995 in private practice. However, due to the fact that my husband and I moved out into the country after purchasing a small farm, I found that getting clients out in rural America was much more difficult. Thus, I decided to offer counseling online via email and telephone to the entire country and also to the world. (Continue reading...)

"Singles Should Look for a Site That Isn't Just Offering Them a Way to Find a Date on Friday Night" - Interview with Real Christian Singles

Real Christian Singles is a non-denominational service to help single Christians find godly mates. It is based on relationship principles from the relationship-enrichment organization LovePath International.

Lee Wilson, founder of Real Christian Singles, answered questions from Christian Counseling Services.

Please tell me a little about your company, and about LovePath International.

Real Christian Singles is a separate entity from LovePath International. Marriage expert Joe Beam founded LovePath International and he has worked with marriages since 1993.

I founded Real Christian Singles in 2004 because so many Christian singles were contacting Joe's organization requesting a way to meet and asking for advice on relationships. (Continue reading...)

"If We Are To Be Set Apart, Then Our Expenditures Must Be Driven by What God Gave Us, Not Our Neighbor" - Interview with Christian Financial Planner Michael W. Boone

Located in Bellevue, Washington, the financial advisory and investment management firm of MW Boone and Associates has been family owned since 1985. The principal, Michael W. Boone, was named one of America's top 250 financial advisors by Worth magazine. He is also a Christian. In an interview with Christian Counseling Services he spoke frankly about the intersection of his work and his faith, and he provided some words of financial advice.

Many Christians are suffering with debt problems in the current recession. What general words of guidance can you offer to help them?

"The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower becomes the lender’s slave" - Proverbs 22:7

The bible is loaded with cautionary advice about debt but many Christians have ignored it and will pay the price along with everyone else. I can’t understand why more churches don’t preach this clearly from the pulpit, but it's perhaps because the church is mired in debt, the pastor is mired in debt, their country is mired in debt, and all the people that they hope to keep paying their bills are mired in debt! (Continue reading...)

Transformations - Powerful Truths About Addiction and Grace

Transformations Drug & Alcohol Treatment Center in Florida offers a wide variety of therapeutic programs to meet client needs. Among these is a Christ-centered approach to drug addiction treatment.

According to the center's website: "Studies have shown that drug addicts who chose a faith-based approach to addiction recovery are more likely to avoid relapse and stay sober. Christian drug treatment, especially, has had a very high rate of success."

Nathan Oliver, Christian Drug Counselor at Transformations, spoke with Christian Counseling Services about his work. (Continue reading...)

SinglesOfFaith.com - Raising an Army of Kingdom Servants

Christian online dating service SinglesOfFaith.com asks visitors to its site a fascinating question: "If God came down and set up a website for the 50,000,000 to 75,000,000 of us single Christians, what would it would be about?" (You can find a suggested answer here.)

The founder Mike McCartney, a certified life and relationships coach, has for ten years been engaged in conducting relationship skills training workshops for single Christians. He answered questions from Christian Counseling Services.

Many Christians are fearful of online dating. Is this a reasonable concern?

Though there is no reason for actual fear (assuming we don't do dumb things like releasing our email address or phone number way too early), it is imperative that believers use extreme caution in online dating. (Continue reading...)

ChristianDatingForFree.com - Christian Dating Completely Free! 100% Free! Really!

At a time when big business is moving into the online dating scene, even the Christian online dating scene, the success of ChristianDatingForFree.com might seem an enigma. It really is free.

A spokesperson explained, in an interview with Christian Counseling Services.

Please tell me a little about ChristianDatingForFree.com. Is it really completely free? How do you do business?

ChristianDatingForFree.com is really completely free. 100% free, no charges ever, no credit card needed. Yeah, we get that often. It’s funny how people still think there might be a fee at some point. I guess we don’t blame them, as there are so many deceptive practices out there. We operate from support by advertisers and donations. (Continue reading...)

Center for Christian Counseling - Miracles on a Regular Basis

The Center for Christian Counseling is absolutely frank about its mission - to offer "real, effective Biblically-based counseling that provides permanent solutions to people's problems."

Jerry Meade, the founder and president, answered some questions from Christian Counseling Services.

Please tell me a little about the Center for Christian Counseling. What kind of people come to you for help?

The Center for Christian Counseling, Ltd. was founded in 1999 in Flower Mound, Texas, as I decided to open a private practice once again, as I had for 10 years in Virginia.

Wanting to provide “truth in advertising”, I prayed and chose the name “The Center for Christian Counseling” so that those coming here would know that they would not receive the world’s ideas on how things work, but only God’s (from His Word). (Continue reading...)

ChistianMingle - Fast-Growing Online Community

ChristianMingle is a popular Christian online dating service, claiming more than 1,000 new members every day. A spokesperson answered questions from Christian Counseling Services.

What is your advice for Christians who are unsure about how to choose an online dating service?

When signing up for an online dating service, get some recommendations from trusted friends, do some of your own online research, and make a budget for yourself, of both time and money, to see just how much you plan to invest in online dating.

But remember – the monthly price for access to thousands of potential matches can cost less than buying an article of clothing! (Continue reading...)

Single Christian Network - "We Try Harder"

Single Christian Network was founded in 1991 and is today one of the largest internet introductory services designed exclusively for Christians. It has had hundreds of thousands of members and has helped thousands of Christians find romance, engagement and marriage. It is generally highly rated by websites that provide reviews of Christian dating services.

Clark S, the CEO, agreed to answer a few questions from Christian Counseling Services.

Many Christians are fearful of online dating – what words of reassurance can you offer them?

People often become confused with the term "online dating." In reality there is no such thing. We date people - not internets. The internet is simply a tool that we use in order to meet others.

Connecting to others through the internet is actually safer than the other methods of meeting. We can remain completely anonymous until we are 100% sure about the other party. This is not true with any other way of communicating. (Continue reading...)

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